Unknown to most of you, my dear
wife for almost fifty years was called Home by her Savior and Lord on Friday,
March 1, 2013 after enduring serious illness for the past five years. Carol was ready to meet Him, and waited
expectantly to hear Him call her name.
There she will suffer no more pain.
Heart disease, diabetes, and all the other related ailments will be things
of the past and remembered no more.
There will be no more hospitals, walkers, or wheel chairs, either. The sick will be healed, the lame will leap
for joy, the blind will see, and the trials of this world will be gone
forever. Today, she is safe and well in
the arms of Jesus.
I penned the following random
thoughts during the early morning hours of the days following her
Home-going. In a way, it was the
beginning of healing for me – a healing that will likely take a long time. My real healing, however, comes from the
Lord. Oh, where would I be without Him
in my life.
I am sharing my thoughts in the
event that you or someone you know might have recently experienced the pain and
heartache of losing a loved one. Perhaps
by reading them, it will bring a glimmer of hope and assurance into your life,
and the knowledge that you are not alone.
May God bless you!
~ ~ ~
RANDOM THOUGHTS OF MY BRIDE
When we lose someone we love
dearly, it can feel as if our heart and soul has been ripped apart and shredded,
then, blown away like confetti in a wind storm.
For me, that is especially true when the loved one was my wife and best
friend who stood beside me for almost 50 years through good times and bad,
through thick and thin, through sickness and health, and through times of
sadness and joy.
But wait! Carol is not lost! Oh, although I cannot touch her, I cannot see
her smiling face, and I cannot hear her voice, I know exactly where she
is. She is safe in the arms of Jesus!
There she will suffer no more pain. Heart disease, diabetes, and all the other
related ailments will be things of the past and remembered no more. There will be no more hospitals, walkers, and
wheel chairs, either. The sick will be
healed, the lame will leap for joy, the blind will see, and the trials of this
world will be gone forever.
It was Carol’s appointed time to
leave us for a little while. God had
called her name. As a born-again
believer she went on down the path ahead of us to meet her Savior and Lord. She was not only ready, but was anxious to
meet Him. That is a journey we all must
take one day. Are you ready to do
that? Do you know Him? You must be very sure. I know that I am ready - and soon I will see
her again!
~ ~ ~
Through all of Carol's life
trials our prayer has always been, "We
trust in You, O Lord - for our times are in Your hand." (Psalm 31:14)
~ ~ ~
We are told in Scripture that we
must run the race that is set before us.
However, we know our journey will not always be smooth. The road we travel will have bumps, twists
and turns along the way. When we keep
the faith and look to the Lord for His leading to carry us over the rough
spots, we will meet at the finish line - with victory in Jesus.
~ ~ ~
Our awesome God is in control!
It is only with His permission that we are allowed to take our next
breath. We must realize that we are all
just a lump of clay in the Master Potter's hands that He will shape and mold
into His perfect plan for our lives.
~ ~ ~
One day we will walk hand in
hand with Jesus - our Savior, Lord and Master.
We will talk and laugh with Him as we stroll together down the streets
of pure gold. Our special mansion will
be ready and waiting for us too. A
massive celebration of continuous praise and worship will be there for us to
join in with them. What a day that will
be!
Until then, all of us must be
thankful for each new morning, and thank God for allowing us to be a part of it
so we can live our days for His honor and glory. Each day we must count our
many blessings He so richly pours out on each one of us. Tomorrow is not
certain, but eternity is – and we must know where we will spend it!
~ ~ ~
I have much faith in the Lord
and was always trying to provide encouragement to Carol, but in my quiet times,
in a quiet place, when I was alone with my thoughts, I felt so sad for her and
my tears would flow. When I was on my
knees in submission to Him, seeking His face in prayer, and looking to Him for
peace, comfort and strength, He always told me to wait on Him for He will never
leave us. He told me we are safe in the
palm of His hand, He cares for us, and to only trust Him for He is in control
and that His Will be done.
~ ~ ~
Heaven is a very real
place. It’s a place to look forward to,
a place to contemplate and to prepare for.
It’s a place where we will be more alive than we are today. The Master Creator is there, building a
special place in heaven just for us.
In John 14:1-4,6 (NKJV), Jesus
gave this promise to us: “Let not your
heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father’s house are many mansions; if it
were not so, I would have told you. I go
to prepare a place for you. And if I go
and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that
where I am, there you may be also. And
where I go you know, and the way you know.
I am the way, the truth, and the life.
No one comes to the Father except through Me.”
One day soon our mansion will be
completed and Jesus will call my name and yours. Are you prepared to meet Him on that day?
~ ~ ~
One of the latter verses of the
gospel hymn, “Amazing Grace”, was
penned as follows:
When we’ve been there ten thousand years,
Bright shining as the sun.
We’ve no less days to sing God’s praise,
Than when we’d first begun.
Ten thousand years - just
imagine! But, when compared to eternity,
ten thousand years are not even a blink of an eye. Eternity will have just begun. It’s simply impossible for me to wrap my
human brain around that concept.
And then, to boggle the mind even
further, the next ten million years will be as a single drop of water in an
ocean that extends forever with no boundaries, nor measurable depth.
Throughout those endless years
there will be no more death or sorrow, no more sickness, no more tears or pain,
and no one will ever grow weary. Also,
there will be no hospitals, or walkers, or canes, or wheelchairs. There will be no more Alzheimer’s, or
dementia, or strokes, or heart disease, or cancer.
Most important of all, however,
is that Jesus will be there, and believers will at long last be Home with Him.
~ ~ ~
Almost 50 years ago Carol and I
made a promise to each other in the presence of a church full of witnesses and
Almighty God that we would love, cherish, honor, protect, and care for one another
as long we had life and breath. Oh,
there were bumps along the way with twists and turns in our path, but with God
leading us every step of the way, we did just that with everything that was
within us. Now that 50 years have almost
past by, the memories linger on and will never be erased from my mind. Would I do it all over again? Yes – in a heartbeat!
~ ~ ~
I believe that today Carol is
strolling hand in hand with Jesus along the streets of pure gold. I believe they are chatting, singing and laughing
as they stop beside the flowing River
of Life with its water
sparkling like liquid diamonds. She is
with her Savior and Lord forever. One
day soon I will join them there. I can’t
wait!
~ ~ ~
In the final weeks before Carol
was called Home to be with the Lord, we both sensed that the end was near. We would spend as much time together as
possible, sitting hand in hand at her bedside with tears flowing, often at 2:00
or 3:00 in the morning, just praying, sharing our inner feelings, re-living our
memories, and comforting one another. It
was during those times that I could picture in my mind’s eye God-sent angels
positioned on each side of her bed with wings wide-spread and touching wingtip
to wingtip forming a shield of protection over us. Carol and I had an unbreakable bond between
us, but our bond with our Lord and Savior was even greater. He promised to be with us until the end - and
He was.
~ ~ ~
Carol was my beloved bride and
best friend for almost fifty years. She
stood close by me through good times and bad, through sickness and health, and
through times of sadness and joy. Now
she has gone away. But, I know exactly
where she is. She is safe in the arms of
Jesus!
Carol went on down the path
ahead of us to be with her Savior and Lord.
Until we meet again, the roses will never fade and the memories will
linger on in my heart.
~ ~ ~
I shared the following at
Carol’s memorial service:
On behalf of my family and
myself, I want to take a moment to thank everyone for being here, for your
prayers, for your support, and for your kind words. We appreciate all of you.
Not long ago Carol told me she
wished she could be a little mouse in a corner during her memorial
service. She wanted to hear the Pastor's
message, enjoy the music, and greet everyone who is here. Well, there probably aren’t any mice in this
Chapel, but I know she is here in our hearts and thoughts today. Carol would be very pleased.
If it were possible, I believe
that Carol would be shouting a final plea from within heaven’s gates to all in
this Chapel who would hear her. She would warn that this is real stuff, it is
serious stuff, and that one day everyone must stand before God to give
account. It won’t be about who we are,
or what we’ve done, or whether we’ve been a good person. It will be all about Jesus and what we have
done with Him. And, it’s not whether we
simply know about Him, it’s whether we truly know Him. There is a huge difference between the
two.
If you are not absolutely sure you
are a repentant, blood-bought, heaven-bound child of God, then, you must to do
some serious business with Him today.
You must receive His free gift of salvation by faith alone before it is
too late.
And, as Carol knows very well - there
is no promise of a tomorrow for anyone.
~ ~ ~
I am not in any big rush to sort
through Carol's things since I will need some time to get myself together
first. Then, they will eventually be distributed according to her wishes.
I had been Carol's life support
every hour of every day for a long time. It seems that I should still be doing
something for her, but now the house is quiet. There is a big empty hole that
will be there for some time. Even my dog Betsy seems lost, but now she needs me
too. Carol was Betsy’s best friend.
~ ~ ~
My family and friends have now
returned to their homes. Except for me
and my dog Betsy, who continues to search each room for Carol, the house is
empty. It is just the two of us trying
to grasp onto something that resembles a normal life. But all has changed, and will never return to
the life as we had known it for so many years. All we have left are the memories that fill
our heart.
~ ~ ~
As Carol’s caregiver, I was her
constant life support for the past few years.
I was tuned into her every need 24 hours a day, and always listened for
her voice calling out to me. Even now in
the quiet hours of the night and day, I sometimes imagine hearing her crying
out for my help. I rush to the bedside
where she once lay, but only to realize once again that she is not with
us. Then, the tears flow because I miss
her so much. Jesus is taking good care
of her now, and one of these days I will join her – never to be separated
again.
~ ~ ~
A house that was once filled
with joy and laughter, family and friends, pain and tears, conversation and
intimate sharing, can do strange things to the mind after those things are
gone. Now, I am finding out that an
empty house can be quite noisy with sounds I don’t remember hearing before. Sometimes the floors creak, ice trapped on
the roof will make crackling noises as it thaws, I hear the furnace fire-up
many times each day, and I even hear Betsy’s nails softly clicking on the tile
floors as she wanders aimlessly from room to room.
I talk randomly and frequently aloud
expecting a response, but the only acknowledgement I hear is the echo of my
words as they bounce off the walls.
Betsy doesn’t even listen to me unless the word “treat” is spoken. However, the Lord is listening and will sweep
away the loneliness. I hope He will
never get tired of hearing my voice.
~ ~ ~
I attended the Sunday morning
worship service at church two days after Carol's memorial. It was the first
time I have been able to be away from home long enough to attend church since
early December. Oh, how I have missed doing that! It was good - so very good! The music selections and the message filled my
parched soul with renewed assurance that I am His and He is mine in spite of
the trials and heartaches we must face in this life. We are never alone with
the Lord by our side. Oh Lord, may the
healing begin with You!
Don
